How to talk to your doctor about memory concerns.
Talking to Your Doctor About Memory: What You Need to Know
Memory concerns can be unsettling — whether you've noticed changes in yourself or someone you love. Forgetting where you put your keys, missing an appointment, or struggling to find the right word in a conversation can feel alarming. But here's something important to know: not all memory changes mean dementia, and talking to your doctor is always the right first step.
Many people wait too long to bring up memory concerns, either because they're worried about what they might hear or because they're not sure their concerns are "serious enough" to mention. The truth is, there is no memory concern too small to bring to your doctor. Early conversations lead to earlier answers — and earlier answers lead to better outcomes.
What Is Normal and What Is Not
It helps to understand the difference between typical age-related memory changes and changes that warrant a closer look.
Normal aging may include:
Occasionally forgetting a name but remembering it later
Misplacing items from time to time
Taking longer to learn new information
Needing reminders for appointments or tasks
Changes worth discussing with a doctor include:
Forgetting recent conversations or events entirely
Getting lost in familiar places
Difficulty managing finances, medications, or daily tasks that were once routine
Noticeable changes in mood, personality, or behavior
Asking the same questions repeatedly within a short time
If any of these sound familiar — for yourself or someone you care for — it is time to make that appointment.
How to Prepare for the Conversation
Walking into a doctor's appointment prepared makes a real difference. Doctors appreciate specific information, and being ready helps you make the most of your time together.
Before your appointment:
Write down the specific memory changes you have noticed, including when they started and how often they occur
Note any other symptoms — sleep problems, mood changes, difficulty with daily tasks
List all current medications, including over-the-counter drugs and supplements, since some can affect memory
Bring a trusted family member or friend who can share what they have observed — a second perspective is genuinely helpful to your doctor
During your appointment, don't be afraid to ask:
What could be causing these changes?
What tests or evaluations do you recommend?
Are there lifestyle changes that could help?
Should I see a specialist, and if so, what kind?
What should I watch for going forward?
Download this free resource to prompt you to ask the right questions and to fill out before you go.
What Your Doctor May Do
Your doctor has several tools available to evaluate memory concerns. The visit may include a physical exam, a review of your medications, blood tests to rule out treatable causes like thyroid issues or vitamin deficiencies, and a brief cognitive screening test. These screenings are not pass/fail — they simply give your doctor a clearer picture of how your memory and thinking are functioning.
Depending on what they find, your doctor may refer you to a neurologist, geriatrician, or memory specialist for a more detailed evaluation.
A Word for Family Members and Caregivers
If you are concerned about someone else's memory, approaching the conversation with care matters. Bring it up gently and privately, focus on specific things you have noticed rather than general accusations, and frame it as coming from a place of love and concern — not judgment. Offering to go to the appointment together can make a big difference for someone who feels anxious or resistant.
The Most Important Thing
Memory concerns are worth taking seriously — but they are also worth taking calmly. Many causes of memory changes are treatable. And for conditions like Alzheimer's disease and other dementias, early detection opens the door to planning, support, and access to the most current treatment options available.
You do not have to have all the answers before you walk into your doctor's office. You just have to start the conversation.
Additional Resources:
Dementia Friendly Indiana Communities is a statewide network dedicated to equipping communities across Indiana to support people living with dementia. For a Road Map and other resources and information, visit www.dfindiana.org
There are often many resources out there to refer to. Dementia Friendly America is a nationwide movement and there are often dementia friendly efforts in each state. Check out www.dfamerica.org for more information.